As anyone familiar with Opal Gardner Purdy Cortlandt, now known simply as OPAL (you know, like CHER, or STING), will tell you, OPAL is an original. Between her meager Southern roots and her obsessive love of Hollywood movie glamour she has devised her own personal way with words.

It began years ago when poor little Emily, I think her name was, yes, she was Donna's daughter, went nuts. Our network censors wouldn't allow us to say the "c" word.. ."crazy". That made me wonder if maybe they were crazy, but that's another story. So how was I going to let the audience know she was crazy without saying "crazy"? Then I remembered a friend of mine from North Carolina telling me her mother was "a couple 'a sandwiches shy of a good picnic," and I had my answer. As they say on T.V., "the rest is history"!

Whether passed down from her granny, picked up at the drive-in movies, or contributed by fans, here are just a few of my favorite OPALisms. If you have any of your own, or you have a funny thing that you wish Opal would say, send it to me at jill@jilllarson.com. Maybe we'll run a contest to vote for a winner (prize to be determined at a later date!!)

I wouldn't wear that to a dog fight if I knew both dogs.